THERE’S A WEBSITE THAT LISTS PROBLEMS THAT ARE EXCLUSIVE TO MEXICAN AMERICANS. I THINK IT’S CALLED MEXICAN PROBLEMS.NET. ON THE SITE THEY POST SOMETIMES FUNNY, SOMETIMES STUPID PROBLEMS THAT A LARGE NUMBER OF MEXICAN AMERICANS HAVE LIKELY EXPERIENCED.
YOU’LL SEE THINGS LIKE THIS:
MEXICAN PROBLEM #3413: AS A KID BEING THREATENED WITH , “SI NO TE PORTAS BIEN, ESA PERSONA TE VA A LLEVAR!” AH YES, MANY MEXICAN AMERICAN CHILDREN HAVE BEEN WARNED THAT IF THEY DON’T BEHAVE WELL, THEIR PARENTS WILL LET A STRANGER TAKE THEM AWAY. IT’S SERIOUS BECAUSE EVERY TIME I HEARD MY PARENTS SAY THAT, THE STRANGER ALWAYS SEEMED TO LOOK AT ME LIKE HE WAS IN ON IT. WHAT THE HECK?!
ANOTHER FAVORITE OF MINE IS THIS ONE:
MEXICAN PROBLEM # 3370: “NO MATTER HOW OLD YOU ARE, YOUR MOM MAKES SURE YOU GO AND SAY HI TO EVERYONE AT THE PARTY.”
YES THESE ARE FUNNY PROBLEMS THAT ARE COMMON TO THE MEXICAN AMERICAN EXPERIENCE AND HISPANIC CULTURE IN GENERAL.
BUT I WANT TO TALK ABOUT A PROBLEM THAT IS COMMON TO MEXICAN AMERICANS THAT IS DEFINITELY NOT FUNNY.
HERE’S MY MEXICAN PROBLEM NUMBER 1: ACCORDING TO A RECENT STUDY, OF ALL ETHNICITIES, MEXICAN AMERICANS ARE THE LEAST LIKELY TO LIFT WEIGHTS! (JOURNAL OF STRENGTH AND CONDITIONING RESEARCH 2012).
AS A MEXICAN AMERICAN, THIS IS TROUBLING. HOW DO WE EXPLAIN THIS? WHAT HAPPENED TO THE HISPANIC MALES WHO HAD THE ABILITY TO BACK UP THE MACHISMO ATTITUDE? NOW WE DRINK TOO MUCH BEER, EACH TOO MANY TORTILLAS, AND HAVE WAY TOO MANY TAPOUT SHIRTS. (OR EATOUT SHIRTS AS SEEN IN THIS PICTURE OF GABRIEL IGLESIAS, MEXICAN AMERICAN COMEDIAN).
WHAT HAPPENED TO THE HARDWORKING GRIT OF HISPANIC WOMEN? HOW MANY OF US HAVE HEARD FAMILY STORIES OF MEXICAN WOMEN GIVING BIRTH IN THE FIELDS WHILE WORKING AS A HARVESTER AND GETTING RIGHT BACK TO WORK? (THESE STORIES ARE NEVER EXAGERATED SO DON’T YOU DARE SUGGEST IT)
THE PHYSICAL PROWESS OF OUR MALES AND THE HARDINESS OF OUR WOMEN WAS AT ONE TIME A SOURCE OF GREAT PRIDE.
SPEAKING FROM A MEXICAN AMERICAN MALE POINT OF VIEW, THIS IS GREATLY DISTURBING. THE MEXICAN AMERICAN RACE WAS CREATED THROUGH THE FUSION OF SPANISH AND INDIGENOUS BLOOD.
ON BOTH SIDES WE ARE DESCENDED FROM WARRIORS. AZTEC BOYS AT A YOUNG AGE WERE SENT TO LEARN THE ART OF WAR. THIS INCLUDED PHYSICAL CONDITIONING, HAND TO HAND COMBAT TRAINING, AND TACTICAL MILITARY STRATEGY TRAINING. WHAT DO OUR YOUTHS DO TODAY? PLAY GRAND THEFT AUTO, EAT MC DONALDS, AND WATCH REALITY TELEVISION.
THIS IS A REAL MEXICAN PROBLEM. CHILDREN ARE BEING RAISED WITHOUT HAVING INSTILLED IN THEM A SENSE OF PRIDE THAT IS BASED IN REALITY. AND THE FACT THAT MEXICAN AMERICANS ARE THE LEAST LIKELY TO LIFT WEIGHTS MEANS THAT THEY ARE MISSING OUT ON THE MYRIAD BENEFITS THAT COME AS A RESULT OF PROGRESSIVE RESISTANCE TRAINING WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY SETTING THEMSELVES UP FOR ARTHRITIS, TYPE II DIABETES, HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE, OBESITY, AND OTHERS.
IF YOU’RE HISPANIC OR KNOW SOMEONE WHO IS HISPANIC OR YOU JUST LIKE MEXICAN FOOD, PLEASE, LET’S TAKE THIS PROBLEM SERIOUSLY. I KNOW IT’S NOT AS ENTERTAINING AS THOSE OTHER MEXICAN PROBLEMS BUT GIVE IT SOME ATTENTION.
I’LL ADMIT, IT’S FUNNY THAT WHEN YOU WERE A KID YOU COULD TELL HOW MUCH TROUBLE YOU WERE IN DEPENDING ON HOW YOUR DAD WHISTLED FOR YOU TO COME HOME.
BUT THIS IS NO LAUGHING MATTER. COME ON MEXICANS, MEXICAN AMERICANS, AND OTHER HISPANICS, LATINOS OR WHATEVER POLITICALLY CORRECT TERM YOU WANT TO USE TO DESCRIBE YOURSELF. LIFT SOME WEIGHTS AND BE PROUD OF YOURSELVES AGAIN AND LET’S FIGHT THIS PARTICULAR MEXICAN PROBLEM.
regular superhumans 